I didn’t post this question on time, but I wanted to answer it, since I started it. The question is do I believe in fate/destiny? The answer is yes, I believe in fate and destiny.
A few years back, my life was rocked by a series of really bad happenings. During that time, there was a girl I knew who did some things that I really couldn’t understand at all. She also ended up deserting me at my lowest and it hurt me very badly, maybe worse than anyone has ever hurt me, considering all the other things that were going on at the time. Losing her marked a turning point in my life, and I wasn’t sure if I was going to recover from it.
When my life was at this lowest point, there was a girl who sudden appeared. She was a very special girl to me. She was literally the only girl who could have explained what had happened with this other girl. Not only that, but she also taught me things about myself that I didn’t even know. My whole worldview was changed as a result of those late-night conversations, and for the first time I began to see and understand a world that was completely oblivious to me prior to meeting her.
Unfortunately, I failed to repair the damage with the one who abandoned me. Eventually, her marriage failed, and she got a divorce last year. I know it caused her a great deal of pain also, so I feel immense sorrow for her. Life really isn’t fair and it’s fraught with heartbreak and suffering. I completely forgive her for any pain she caused me, and I hope she forgives me for not understanding her at the time.
I have always sort of believed in fate, and I certainly believe it was fate that brought me and this girl together. I really don’t know if I would be here today if I hadn’t met her. I owe her my life. I sincerely hope that one day fate will allow me to repay her, with interest. That is one of the things that keeps me going. Fate is unpredictable, but it certainly could happen. I’ll always be here if she needs me for anything. May God bless her eternally.
Do you believe in fate or destiny? Has there been a time in your life when the exact thing you needed seemed to appear at exactly the right time? Have you ever met someone who changed your whole perspective? Let me know in the comments, and don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe!
Today, I am asked to describe a phase in life that was difficult to say goodbye to. I believe it started sometime in 2018 and lasted until late 2023. I think of this phase as the period of hope. My life was in pretty bad shape when the period began, but someone came along who gave me hope that things would improve somehow. I just couldn’t figure out how to make the right changes happen without messing a lot of things up for everyone, so I just stalled. I relied entirely on hope, but at least I had that to keep me going.
Sometime in 2023, around the time I paused on my blogging, a couple of events occurred that caused me to lose all the hope I had of a miracle happening. It seemed to have been preceded by a reading of cards, indicating that a new beginning was coming. It was also around the time the person who started this period briefly came back into my life to announce her marriage was a total failure and she had filed for divorce. I think things will keep going and I will be okay, but I don’t have much hope things will correct themselves at this point.
Now, I have the period of drinking and bar patronizing to look forward to. What joy. At least my ability to write convincing characters with severe alcohol problems is maturing rapidly. I also have the bar scene down pat, if I need to incorporate that into a book. I mean, it’s not the first time I’ve heard of writers doing a bit of wine bibbing. Steven King devoted some lines to his experience with it in his book On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft. At least I haven’t taken up smoking yet. I’m mostly just kidding about this (maybe).
It’s not all bad. The period of hope actual made me stressed enough to quit my job and take on a new one. It pretty much doubled my salary. The struggle to pay the rent kind of flew out the window after that, along with all my other money problems. Being able to live large did open up other doorways though, hence the bar hopping. It’s still lonely, but that’s kind of my fault. I can be lonely in a crowded room full of people, if it’s not the right people.
I’m not new to the phases of life, having endured quite a few by now. They all seem like mini lifetimes in themselves, barely having any relation to previous periods, each one with its own distinct personality and habits. I’m just now being introduced to this new one’s personality. Maybe he and I will become great friends by the end. You don’t know until it’s over, whether they will also be difficult to say goodbye to, or you welcome their exit off center stage with a swift kick. I guess we’ll see, but the most concerning thing to me is who I will be when they leave.
What phase did you hate to leave behind? Do phases of life seem to have a distinct personality? Ever have to give up hope on something you wanted badly? Do you struggle with loneliness? How would you describe the current phase of your life? Let us know in the comments, and don’t forget to like and subscribe!
A few posts back, I mentioned that I am trying to get a feel for different book genres and started collecting suggestions from you. I am going to reblog that post below for reference. Please feel free to add to the list by commenting on the post. I am still processing through one book at a time, and I hope to read all of your suggestions. Please feel free to read along and add your own thoughts in the comments.
The book I just finished is called Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come by Jessica Pan. I thoroughly enjoyed this book! I was once a shy introvert just like Jessica describes in this book. I managed to overcome most of my shyness gradually over the years, but she takes a different approach. She just throws caution to the wind and dives headlong into an introvert’s hell all at once. I found her journey to be entertaining and insightful. I really do believe we were meant to continue to make friends throughout our whole lives, not just during our younger years. Making new friends is also an objective I strive for daily. If you are also a shy person, I think you will equally enjoy reading this book. Five stars!
On a side note, I found Jessica’s relationship with her husband to be very interesting. She’s literally connecting with everyone under the sun, traveling abroad by herself and everything. It was kind of refreshing to see how trusting they were in their relationship. I guess I’ve witnessed too many relationships where jealousy binds the couple up in such a way that they are afraid to venture out very far, which is really sad to me.
An introvert spends a year trying to live like an extrovert with hilarious results and advice for readers along the way.
What would happen if a shy introvert lived like a gregarious extrovert for one year? If she knowingly and willingly put herself in perilous social situations that she’d normally avoid at all costs? Writer Jessica Pan intends to find out. With the help of various extrovert mentors, Jessica sets up a series of personal challenges (talk to strangers, perform stand-up comedy, host a dinner party, travel alone, make friends on the road, and much, much worse) to explore whether living like an extrovert can teach her lessons that might improve the quality of her life. Chronicling the author’s hilarious and painful year of misadventures, this book explores what happens when one introvert fights her natural tendencies, takes the plunge, and tries (and sometimes fails) to be a little bit braver.
Are you an introvert or extrovert? Have you ever tried to overcome your fears by facing off against them? Would you ever do standup comedy? Have you ever traveled abroad by yourself? Do you think jealousy ruins a relationship? Let me know your thoughts in the comments, and remember to like, share, and subscribe!
I walked into the crowded bar and began trying to find my way to the end because I saw an empty seat down there. Most of the people at the bar were congregating in a big huddle at the center of the bar, forcing me to squeeze through with a lot of excuse me, excuse me, coming through. They parted to let me pass, but I seemed to go unnoticed otherwise, because they were way too busy with their conversations and merry making.
When I got to the vacant bar seat, I noticed there was a girl sitting at the corner of the bar where no one really wants to sit because it doesn’t face the bartenders. It faces the whole length of the bar. She was just sitting there by herself, and there was one seat between us. Unlike the other bar attendees, this girl did notice me, almost immediately.
Shortly after I sat down, she began to strike up a conversation. There was some back and forth talk between us, and then she said, taste this, and pushed her drink toward me. This wasn’t the first time I had been asked to taste someone’s drink. I know the drill, sip from the lip, not the straw, and the alcohol will kill the germs anyway.
The thing that surprised me though, was that I had only said a handful of words to this girl, and she was already treating me like her BFF. I must admit, I kind of loved that about her. Honestly, I wish I met someone like her every time I walked into a bar. Friendly people are the best kind of people in the world. I sort of had a similar feeling about her also. It was like I knew her my whole life or something.
To my surprise, her husband then came out of the bathroom and sat in the stool between us, which I guess had been his seat all along. This had no real effect on the conversation though, which was kind of refreshing. I guess I’ve seen way too many jealous men in my life. I introduced myself to him of course.
He was a very quiet guy and I found out he was a programmer, but mostly I learned that from the girl, as she was the talkative one. She told me they both had the same degree, but he made way more money. She said it was because he was a brilliant programmer, and she was more in sales. I remember he mentioned they thought about starting a business together.
Pleasant conversation went back and forth for a while, and she ordered another drink, and of course she pushed it over for me to taste. I was starting to think this was her thing. She wanted a drinking buddy. I tasted it using the same method described earlier and said, tastes pretty good. She seemed pleased by my answer and smiled.
At some point, she mentioned that she used to party a lot and one time she met this guy who lived downtown like me. He took her to a bar, but she couldn’t remember the name of it. After she described it to me, I told her there’s only one bar like that around here. I told her the name of the bar and she started searching for it on her phone’s map. She told her husband something and I saw him enter it into his Uber app. They then worked on their drinks until the driver arrived.
He walked out earlier, and he sort of left her behind for a few minutes. I thought it was sort of peculiar that they didn’t walk out together, definitely not the characteristic of a jealous person. She finished off her last drink and walked around beside me. She told me how great it was talking to me, and I could come with them if I wanted. I declined because it wasn’t my kind of bar.
At this point, based on her body language and the fact that she was just standing there beside me, I came to the conclusion that she wanted me to give her a goodbye hug. I obliged her by standing up and giving her a nice affectionate hug, which seemed to make her very happy, and then she was off, maybe to never to be seen again in this lifetime.
You may have noticed that I like to write about encounters like this one. I don’t know why, but I feel like they are important. I left the bar that night feeling pretty good about life. She gave that to me. Sometimes, a person just acknowledging you exists can make your day. She gave me her full attention, and at the end, she insisted on sharing some affection. People like her make life beautiful.
Possible discussion ideas.
Ever been hugged by someone you just met?
Ever met someone and it feels like you already knew them?
Do you think acknowledging someone can improve their outlook?
Would the world be better or worse with more affection?
Can you pick your friends or is there a deeper connection?
Ever shared a drink with someone?
Ever seen or been in a jealous relationship?
Are you good at reading body language?
Let me know what you think in the comments, and don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe!
When I was very young, I lived with my grandparents, and the neighborhood had quite a few people from their generation. One such couple lived right across the garden from the place where I lived.
I should explain that it was a small rural town that I lived in, and practically everyone had a garden. Most of the people in the community were retired farmers, so it made sense that they would continue their occupation on a smaller scale in their golden years. It kept them active, and also produced a lot of fresh vegetables every year.
This couple had a son who was killed in tragic accident, leaving several children behind, most of which were girls, but there was one boy, and all these children lived with their grandparents next door, right on the other side of the garden. Some of my earliest memories as a kid was with these girls. They came over often, and were among my first friends. I would definitely say those early interactions with them had a profound lifelong effect on how I see girls.
I thought she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen in my life, and I just liked everything about her.
On one warm summer day, I remember being outside, when one, or maybe more than one, of these girls came over. They had another girl with them that I had never seen before. She was slightly younger than me and had light blonde hair. She sort of struck differently from other girls. I thought she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen in my life, and I just liked everything about her.
They didn’t stay too long this time. I think they were mainly introducing her to us. You see, these girl’s deceased dad had a brother, and he was getting married to this girl’s mother, so she was becoming a new member of their family. She wouldn’t be living next door, but the idea that I might see more of her made me really happy.
She stormed out of the house and looked very upset about something. She then walked around the side of the house and just stood there. It looked like she was pouting about something.
When they left, I continued about my day, but I was still very curious about this new girl. I remember I kept looking over toward her grandmother’s house, hoping she would come outside, and then I saw something odd happen. She stormed out of the house and looked very upset about something. She then walked around the side of the house and just stood there. It looked like she was pouting about something. Maybe it was my imagination, but I sort of got the impression that she wanted to come back over to my house, but they told her no.
That’s about all I remember of that day, but when school started back up she was there. She wasn’t in my grade, but I saw her on the playground everyday. She had made friends with a girl and they would walk around the playground together. I don’t remember all the interactions that lead up to it, but I somehow ended up talking to them one day.
We just walked around the playground holding hands, but I remember on one occasion she kissed me on the cheek. I remember it made me feel really happy inside.
We were all quite young, but we seemed to know about boyfriend and girlfriend relationships. It seems odd that romantic feelings would exist even in grade school, but there they were. I think she asked me if I wanted to be her boyfriend, and I said yes of course. It was all very innocent. We just walked around the playground holding hands, but I remember on one occasion she kissed me on the cheek. I remember it made me feel really happy inside.
I never wanted it to end, but eventually it did, and then I had to watch her walk around the playground holding another guy’s hand. I was young though, so there weren’t really any bad feelings about it, but I honestly never stopped liking her.
I never found the courage to make that ride though. I left the letter stuffed inside the handlebars of my old bike, never to be read by anyone.
I remember one day I thought up this brilliant idea. I would write her a love letter to tell her all the things I wanted to say to her. I would then get on my bicycle and pedal all the way out to her house in the country and hand deliver it. I never found the courage to make that ride though. I left the letter stuffed inside the handlebars of my old bike, never to be read by anyone.
We went though many grades together, and I watched her grow up, still always beautiful, still always positive and funny. I remember we would occasionally interact, but as I grew older, I became increasingly shyer, and I was especially shy around her.
I remember one day I ended up sitting on the bus beside her by accident. I was so nervous that I couldn’t even say anything. She didn’t say anything to me either. I loved that she was sitting with me, but it was very awkward. I thought she probably saw me as weird just sitting there perfectly quiet. If only she knew how I really felt.
I was a little heartbroken, but how could a shy guy like me ever get up the nerve to ask her out?
She eventually moved off to another town, met some guy, and got married. I don’t think she was even out of high school yet. I was a little heartbroken, but how could a shy guy like me ever get up the nerve to ask her out? I also wasn’t exactly the coolest guy around back then (That came later, 😉 ). She could do way better than me.
I had finally gained my nerve, and so I told her all about my crush on her. Turns out, she had a crush on me too.
Marriage pretty much ended any hope I had of being with her, and we eventually lost track of each other, but eventually we found each other again through the magic of social media. At some point, I began to notice that she seemed to like practically everything I posted. Curious about that, I messaged her and started a conversation. I had finally gained my nerve, and so I told her all about my crush on her. Turns out, she had a crush on me too.
We are still friends to this day, and I believe she is actually the only friend I stayed in contact with from childhood. She just started a new relationship. I hope it works out. The other day I sent her a text about one of my writing prompts. I will share our responses.
Hottie from across the garden.
Did you ever find out later that someone you had a crush on also had one on you? Did you ever tell someone that you had a crush on them? What’s your story? Let me know in the comments, and don’t forget to subscribe!
Ken's Life 
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